It's Back-to-School and Back-to-the-Office for Millions of Us. Here are 3 Powerful Tools for Managing Anxiety and Moving Forward if You're Feeling Overwhelmed This Week

Anxiety is pervasive these days. As we send our children back to school, our thoughts are weighted by those who’ve lost loved ones in Uvalde, Highland Park, and other mass shootings. We’re confronting an atrophying hope around our work and hustle culture. We’re concerned over our health and safety, the state of our nation, and the future of younger generations. At times it feels like a bear is on our chests.

Anxiety is a part of the human experience, says psychiatrist Dr. Tracey Marks. But the fact that anxiety is normal doesn’t negate the truth that it can be uncomfortable, hard, and overwhelming. Dr. Marks focuses on the reality of anxiety in her new book, Why Am I So Anxious? Her words offer a close look at what anxiety is, why we have it, and how we can better cope with it and soothe ourselves.

Dr. Mark’s focus is clear: She wants to provide a way to better understand and see through our distress. “I want people who struggle with anxiety to realize that you can have a toolkit at the ready that can help them manage their anxiety naturally,” she says.

We asked Dr. Marks to set us down that path.

Editor’s Note: Dr. Marks notes there is normal anxiety, which is a response to a stressor that gives you some degree of distress, and pathological anxiety, which is a response to a stressor that results in not being able to sleep, eat, or function. The following exercises focus on normal anxiety.

A CONVERSATION WITH DR. TRACEY MARKS

How do you describe anxiety?

Anxiety is the experience of feeling distress triggered by something external or internal. That distress can be mental, or it can be physical. People can experience physical distress in their body, such as increased heart rate, hyperventilating, or feeling nauseous.

What do we get wrong about anxiety?

One thing we get wrong about anxiety is assuming that any experience or feeling of distress is abnormal and that there's something wrong with you and you need to take something to make it go away. An example would be the person who gets anxious about taking a test and feels they need to see a doctor or take a pill because of that. There are life stressors that are going to make us feel tense, nervous, and anxious. But we can manage this and get past it.

Your book includes mind tools, body tools, and behavioral tools to help cope with anxiety. What is one of each that we can start to incorporate today?

Breathing awareness (a mind tool).

This combines mindfulness with breathwork.

Start by closing your eyes and focusing on your breathing pattern. Do this without trying to change how you're breathing. So if you’re not taking deep breaths in and out, don’t try to slow your breaths. All you need to do is observe your breathing pattern. Notice the rise and fall of your chest. Do you notice your stomach rising and falling? Is it rapid? Is it slow? Do you feel like your breaths are deep versus shallow?

What this does is it channels your thinking from the worries of life—from your to-do list all to all these things that are going on—and it focuses it on something neutral. You’re focusing on something in the present without judgment. This practice is very calming. It is also a mental strengthening exercise because it teaches you to disconnect from distressing thoughts and channel them into more neutral, soothing thoughts.

Forced laughter (a behavior tool).

This one is a cell phone laughter exercise, where you’re laughing through an activity. Start by pretending you're talking on the phone, holding the cell phone to your ear. Instead of talking, laugh by saying “ha ha ha” or “he he he.” Change the tone and the laughing words as you breathe in and out. Make it sound like you're having a rich conversation.

You can also do the hula hoop laugher exercise. Start by gently rolling your hips like you’re trying to do the hula hoop and say, ‘ooh, ahh’ and then force some laughter.

These tools can help to diffuse tension, improve your mood, and reduce your stress in the moment. The forced laughter can also generate spontaneous laughter.

A weighted blanket (a body tool).

This is the concept of deep pressure touch and is a way to induce relaxation and comfort. It’s the same concept as swaddling a baby. Touch is just therapeutic in general. Also, the pressure of a weighted blanket can give you the same effect as a light massage. You can use this to sleep under, or you could use a weighted blanket on your lap as you work to help you feel more grounded.

Dr. Tracey Marks is a general and forensic psychiatrist of over 20 years. Her mission is to increase mental health awareness and understanding by educating people on psychiatric disorders, mental well-being, and self-improvement. You can learn more at markspsychiatry.com and order her new book Why Am I So Anxious? Powerful Tools for Recognizing Anxiety and Restoring Your Peace here.