This Moment Is All We Have

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about time—mine, yours, and especially this time we are all living in.

On so many days, it feels surreal, doesn’t it? One minute we’re getting a tsunami warning, then all of a sudden there’s a fire or an earthquake or a hurricane or a heat wave. Yes, that’s Mother Nature, but it also feels true of our politics. Just this week alone, Americans were confronted with headlines about The Corporation for Public Broadcasting shutting down, a weak jobs report, and the president’s firing of the Labor Statistics commissioner in retaliation for that report. It feels like every day brings another headline that starts with, We have never seen this before.

All this has got me thinking about how I spend my time. Who do I want to spend my time with? And where I want to spend my time moving forward? Do I want to spend it on stories that rile me up? Do I want to spend it with people steeped in misinformation? No, I don’t. You see, I’m well aware that I don’t have the luxury of time on my side, and I’m also aware that none of us knows how much time we have here on this earth.

When we’re young, we think that we have so much time to fulfill our dreams and do the things we want. But so many young people don’t get that chance. Just think about the four people shot in cold blood in a New York City office building this past week. Those people had their entire lives in front of them. They had dreams, stuff to do, and families who loved them. What a horror. What a reminder that today is all we truly have.

This moment in time is our most precious resource. That’s why how we spend today matters. It’s a big decision. It’s not something we should just run through. I’m reminded of that this morning by Barry Hoffner, who writes below about how, after losing his wife, he decided to spend his time traveling—discovering and rediscovering places—and sharing what he learned along the way. That’s how he chose to spend his time, and I’m so glad he took the time to share his learnings with us here.

As many of you know, a few years ago, I started taking a break in August. This column will be my last until the beginning of September, when I return. I’m writing to you today from my childhood home in Hyannisport, Massachusetts, where I come every August to spend time with my family. I must say: I’m so mad at myself for not doing a better job of this very thing when my parents were alive. Now I can only visit their graves here. So, if you have your parents, spend this time with them! Don’t wait.

I come here to Hyannisport to reconnect with my brothers and their families. I want to walk with them, laugh with them, and get to know who they are at this moment in time. My relationships with them and my cousins matter to me, so I spend time nurturing them, honoring them, and strengthening them. I want to know my extended family now—not just who they were as kids.

That brings me to what I’ve been thinking I want less of. Less stuff. Fewer meetings. No more toxicity or chaos. I heard Arthur Brooks speak not long ago about a "Want Less” strategy. He said: “The secret to satisfaction is not to increase our haves. The secret is to manage our wants." He explained that happiness is a ratio: Haves ÷ Wants = Satisfaction. Most people focus on the “haves,” but the wiser move is managing our “wants.”

That really struck me. I immediately wanted to know more (ha) about managing my haves versus my wants. That’s why I’m so honored that he took the time this week to sit down with us here at The Sunday Paper to talk about exactly that—about how our happiness is directly tied to being okay with what we have and not always wanting more.

Now, loving where you are in life doesn’t mean you don’t still want to make the world better. It doesn’t mean you don’t want to continue doing what you’re doing. I think it just means that you don’t have to keep adding new things to your plate. More stuff. More meetings. More busyness. You don’t have to keep running around like a chicken with its head cut off. You can focus on the beautiful life that you have, and the beautiful work you have already accomplished.

And yes, there are things we can all get rid of. In fact, my cousin Caroline, after looking at my son‘s registry for his wedding, said: “Hey, I think you should do a get rid of registry in honor of your upcoming birthday.” Several years ago, she and my cousin Sydney walked around my house and counted all the picture frames, remarking that there were too many (which I agreed). I have fewer now, but I could have even less!

But wanting less isn’t just about frames. It’s a strategy for life, no matter your age. It’s about freeing up time and space. Less stuff. Less busyness. Fewer to-dos. More time to focus on your health. More time for those you love, as well as for those you want to learn how to love better.

That’s why I’m so excited about the extraordinary books that we’ll be launching this fall through my publishing imprint The Open Field. You can get a glimpse of them below. Each of these authors wrote from a place of service, offering up their life experience in the hope it might help someone else. Diane Button, an incredible death doula, teaches us lessons from the bedside of the dead about how to live better today. Clea Shearer about what she learned from facing cancer at a really young age. And Emma Heming Willis opens up about what it was like to receive her husband Bruce’s dementia diagnosis and how she has found her voice out of this incredible pain.

All of these authors are using their voices to remind us that this moment is all we have. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. And how we go through what life throws in our way is really, in so many ways, up to us.

So this August, I’m going to think about my life. I’m going to think about my “Want Less” strategy. I want to read less news, because so much of it just triggers me. I’ll be off social media, which will free up a lot of my time and attention. I’m looking forward to building memories with my grandchildren and more memories with my kids. I’m also excited and emotional about my son getting married. I want to feel the joy and the tears. I feel both already, and that’s okay. I’m also going to take my time before I add anything new to my schedule. That’s huge for me, as I’m always getting excited about something and adding to my plate.

Before I head off on my break, I want to take a moment to thank all of you who spend your time with me at this publication every Sunday. I’m so proud of what we have all built together here. I hope that The Sunday Paper is more than just content for you—it’s an act of service. It’s service journalism with soul. Every story, every reflection, and every contributor we share with you here is meant to uplift, inform, and move you. You won’t find the voices of pundits like you will in most other media outlets. No, our intention is to share great minds who have great hearts. Our voices are caregivers, truth-tellers, and survivors writing from the front lines of their lives. This is a space for people who care deeply about the world, about growth, about one another. Our goal is to create space throughout the week to help you slow down, reflect, and return to what truly matters. In a world that runs 24/7, The Sunday Paper offers a soulful moment in time to reset, recharge, and prepare yourself to move humanity forward.

Time: it is our most precious resource. So, thank you for spending your time here with us at The Sunday Paper. Truly, this publication would not be what it is had all of you not joined in, supported it, shared it, talked about it, and built it up from the inside out. You’ve spent hours upon hours reading the content here. You’ve spent your time with us, and that means the world to me.

So this August while I take a break, I hope you’re able to find a little time to do the same. I hope that you get to take some time to spend with yourself, and also with those you love. I’ll see you out in The Open Field, or somewhere in Massachusetts, or wherever my heart takes me. And I’ll return here to you in September. God bless you.

P.S. While Maria takes a break this August, we will still be publishing lighter editions of The Sunday Paper. We would love for you to join us and see what we have in store.

Also in this week’s issue:

• Arthur C. Brooks’ Secret to More Joy

• Lessons from Traveling the World in the Wake of Devastating Loss

• Maria Is Featured in Forbes 50 Over 50

• Coming Soon from The Open Field: Emma Heming Willis, Clea Shearer, and Diane Button