How to Declutter Your Inner and Outer World
We all live with clutter. It shows up in our home—as too many possessions, a chaotic environment, or a dishonoring of the very things we have chosen to keep. It also shows up in our inner home—as untrue thoughts and beliefs, unhelpful emotions, compromised energy, and detrimental ways of relating.
Clutter is created by the ego in us, which is focused on self-preservation, survival, scarcity, competition, and holding on. Its mantra is I am not enough, you are not enough, and there is not enough. And it keeps us oriented to the past and the future.
In contrast, the soul in us is focused on safety, peace, abundance, love, and letting go. Its mantra is I am enough, you are enough, and there is enough. And it is most at home in the present. Think of clutter as anything—inside or out—that is not aligned with your soul nature.
Decluttering is an invitation to release what doesn’t serve and reclaim what was yours all along. It starts in your inner home, because what goes on inside is reflected in your actual home and life. For example, thoughts don’t just stay thoughts. Believe them, and they become emotions and energy, patterns in your relationships, and stuff in your house. For better or for worse.
The Time Is Now
Clutter reveals where you are aligned with the past/future orientation of your ego. The clutter you hold onto doesn’t belong to you now. It belongs to a version of you that is already gone, or one that may never arrive.
For example, when you hang out in past-time, you repeatedly share your trials and tribulations, often feel angry or regretful, and have an overstuffed file cabinet. When you hang out in future-time, you plan ahead to the point of missing the moment, stay prepared for impending disasters, and have lots of things you keep “just in case.”
Releasing and reclaiming requires alignment with presence. Your soul is at home in present-time, living in the present moment as it truly is, and in yourself as you truly are. One of the questions I rely on for decluttering asks, Is it in present-time? Let’s explore that question in your inner home.
Mental Clutter
The ego does not live in the here and now. It feeds you a steady stream of past and future thoughts, bouncing you all over in time. First, you’re regretting the pizza you ate for lunch. Then you’re worrying your son’s life will be over if he isn’t admitted to that private kindergarten. Next, you’re furious about something your partner said last night.
We experience thousands of thoughts a day, most of them repetitive, out of present-time, and reflective of our fear-based ego nature, not our soul nature. It’s best to watch ego thoughts like clouds passing by. Attaching to them creates unnecessary suffering. And when you repeatedly attach to them, they become ego-affirming beliefs that take up residence in your inner home. Some common ones are: I must achieve to earn love. I have to do it all myself. The world is unsafe. I have to keep up with the Joneses.
You can’t evict thoughts or beliefs by fighting against them. Fighting the ego is a losing battle. What you can do is come into presence. Notice the thought or belief. Question it—Is it true? Is it kind? Does it lift my energy? Is it really me now, in present-time?
In presence, mental clutter releases. You move out of default ego mode and can reclaim soul-affirming thoughts and beliefs, like: I am worthy as I am. There are helpers everywhere. I am safe. My purpose is to serve my love to the world. Let these lead the way and see what magic happens in your life.
Emotional Clutter
Ego-aligned emotions such as anger, sadness, shame, resentment, loneliness, worry, or fear are not bad or wrong. They are simply in the past and future. And when you’re hypnotized by them, you suffer.
Emotion is energy in motion, meant to pass through naturally. We have all witnessed this in children—wailing and inconsolable one moment, then calm and sweet the next, happily eating an apple slice.
As adults, we inhibit this flow. Do you analyze emotions rather than feel them? Fear that if you start crying, you will never stop? Push away emotions like anger or grief? Feel numb, fatigued, overwhelmed, or chronically irritated?
Whatever emotion arrives at your door is the one most in need of your attention and love. Welcome it, and it moves through. Refuse it, and it becomes a squatter in your inner home.
Practice answering the door when an emotion knocks. Sit with the emotion in present-time acceptance until it releases, leaving you free to reclaim soul feelings of peace and contentment. You may even find yourself eating an apple slice.
Energetic Clutter
We all have an energy field around us, a personal bubble that is our inner energetic home. When you are in your bubble in present-time, you feel like yourself—grounded and clear. But if you’re not paying attention, your energy bubble can be easily infiltrated.
Get curious about what scatters your energy about in past or future time. Your friend’s crisis. A daily rhythm that differs from your own. The relentless pace of the world. The fear and rage of the news cycle. People on speakerphone in public. Constant busyness.
It’s challenging to maintain present-time energy. Here are some signs you have slipped out of present-time and your energy has been compromised. Your mood changes for no apparent reason. You feel confused about something you were clear on before. You can’t get someone out of your head. You feel tired and wired.
One way to reclaim your energy is to drop into the quiet of the present moment. Being in silence calms an overstimulated nervous system, restores your best rhythm, and releases energetic clutter. It also has an added benefit. In silence, you can hear your intuition—a gut feeling, an image in your mind, or a knowing in your bones. This is the language of your inner home. To reclaim present-time energy, spend time in nature, and watch balance return to your body, mind, and spirit. Go for a walk without putting on another podcast, and listen for your own information and wisdom. Talk less so you can hear soul-affirming guidance.
Relational Clutter
A relationship may be in past-time, in that it once suited you but doesn’t fit who you are now. Or in future-time, if you are waiting for someone to change so the relationship will align. Relational decluttering is about relating in ways that honor your soul in present-time.
Start in your inner home, with your relationship contracts—the unspoken agreements you’ve made to create bonding and harmony. They may be ego-affirming, and in past/future time. I’ll put your needs ahead of mine. I’ll dim my light to let yours shine. I’ll take care of you even if it means abandoning myself. I’ll hide your addiction if you hide mine.
Look for signs of misalignment, such as feeling chronically underappreciated, misunderstood, or even abused. They reflect the need to update a contract. First, in yourself. Then, with the other person. If you can’t bring the contract into present-time, it may be complete and ready for release. Aim to create soul-supporting, present-time relational contracts going forward. We honor each other’s needs and gifts. We’re self-loving individuals coming together to love one another and the world. We can both shine. That’s reclaiming your inner relational home.
Re-Align. Release. Reclaim.
Decluttering is a way of life, rather than a task to complete. To release the ego-aligned past/future, and reclaim the soul-aligned now, use my favorite tool—the magic of 10 percent. Let 10 percent of your thoughts float by without believing them. Feel 10 percent more of your emotions as they arrive. Say no to 10 percent of daily energetic intruders. Spend 10 percent more time bringing your soul to relationships. And because physical clutter reflects your inner home, release 10 percent of past-time and future-time stuff—like the old bin of your college coursework or the crutches from your knee surgery you keep “just in case” you need them again.
When you align to your truest self in present-time, clutter can’t exist, and you feel more peace, more joy, and more at home, inside and out.
Peggy Fitzsimmons, Ph.D., has helped many people get their inner and outer houses in order through intensive decluttering. She is the author of Release: Create a Clutter Free and Soul Driven Life. Previously, she was a staff member of the Omega Institute and a consulting producer on Oprah Winfrey’s Emmy-winning TV series Super Soul Sunday. Her new course, Release Clutter, Reclaim Your Soul-Aligned Life, is available now.
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